Martin & Ellen’s Story - Fostering Siblings
04 August 2021
04 August 2021
Blue Sky foster carers, Martin and Ellen, know the value of keeping siblings together, as they welcomed three siblings into their home in the summer of 2013.
“We really enjoyed bringing up our two children but they had flown the nest and we were left with a big, empty, family home” explains Ellen. “We considered moving to a smaller house, but something clicked and we thought we should use our skills and the space in our home to foster children and young people.”
“After we had been approved to foster, the Blue Sky Placements team contacted us very quickly, to ask us if we could offer a foster home to a sibling family of three, who lived in our area. The children had been neglected and needed the support, boundaries and encouragement of normal family life”.
“Initially, we thought we could look after two children at the most, but when we were told about Jamie, Danny and Sarah, our hearts melted. We had to keep them together. Jamie was just 13 when they came to us. Their parents couldn’t cope with looking after the children and Jamie had been the one to get Danny and Sarah ready for school each day.
"The three of them are their own little support network and we knew they had to stay together.”
As the children settled into their new home, Martin and Ellen set about helping them with their schooling and hobbies.
“We understood the younger two had additional needs due to Foetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD), which causes developmental and learning delays in affected children. The little boy, Danny, had trouble explaining things and the little girl, Sarah, needed one to one tuition and help with her behavioural problems. Sitting still in the classroom was a big problem, but the teachers found a solution to this by giving her a ‘comfy cushion’ to sit on and she now settles nicely in class. Blue Sky arranged for us to attend a course on FASD and we were able to share our new found knowledge with the school teachers, which was really useful for all concerned.”
We can’t imagine life without them.
The eldest of the three, Jamie, has formed a strong bond with Martin.
“I’m the main carer as Ellen works, so I’m the one who does the school runs, takes them to their after school clubs and to and from their friends’ homes” explains Martin.
“We encourage the children’s hobbies. Jamie is such a talented photographer, we’re very proud of him. He likes to watch Top Gear and was inspired to build a coffee table similar to the one on the show. He stripped an engine down, cleaned it and carefully painted it, then we topped it off with a square piece of toughened glass and it takes pride of place in our sitting room. Our son commissioned him to make one for his home, too, and he’s delighted with his.”
“Like all siblings, they wind each other up from time to time, but this is lessening, we can predict when things are going to get a little strained between them and intervene before they become upset.
"They’re a big part of our family and our own sons have welcomed them as younger siblings. We all spent Christmas with our son who lives in the north west of England and having the three children with us made it an extra special time.”
04 August 2021